A guidebook to the US Open
Honestly: THE ULTIMATE guidebook to the US Open
If you’re young and drunk or old and hungover and find you have no memory of you how in the world you ended up in the greatest city of all, I have just the place for you. New York’s hottest club is the US Open in Queens. This place has everything: hot days and cool days, hot guys and cool girls. It has food booths from the best restaurants of the city where they serve their signature dishes in a slightly worse version, it has drinks that taste like lemonade but name themselves after melons. What it doesn’t have: drugs and Carlos Alcaraz. Here is how you survive a day at the Open and somehow even find it in you to have fun.
What court to attend:
Move over Grandstand, move over Stadium 17. A new top dog is in town. Court 5 is the hottest place to be in an already boiling scene. It’s where 18-year-old prodigy Joao Fonseca from Brazil had all of Queens chanting his name despite losing in the final round of qualifying to AN AMERICAN. It’s where Elina Svitolina came back from a set down in the first round of main draw action and had the crowd go wild on her behalf. This is where the locals gather. Where the up and coming generations show what the future brings and immigrants remember their home countries through tennis players. Come early and sit up on the stands. If you’re lucky, you’ll see two or three of the greatest matches of the tournament and on top of that you’ll have the perfect view over court 6 where, rumours say, Dan Evans and Karen Khachanov are still playing to this day.
What to eat:
You can have it all really. Americans know how to food, entertain and build high buildings. But for this sake’s text we will focus on the food. My two favourite things in the food court are the Pastrami sandwich at Carnegie Deli and the coleslaw at the barbecue place next door. The Pastrami is thick and juicy (just like me after two years of retirement), the coleslaw is not to mayonnaise heavy. Mix and match or eat individually. Either way, you won’t be disappointed.
What to drink:
It would be amiss of me to not mention the Honey Deuce cocktail for a bargain of 23 US Dollars. You won’t get drunk on it but you will ask yourself why they focus on a melon when this is clearly a lemonade. Lemon Deuce didn’t sound so fancy? Heads up: this year, they only allow you to buy two at a time. So, you definitely won’t get drunk on them. The hope is to keep the crowd at bay, to control the outbursts of rowdiness, so to say. Their bad, because Daniil Medvedev is still very much in this tournament. Do NOT try the watery misery that is the Espresso Martini and who the hell puts ice cubes in beer? Immediate default. Stick with the Lemon Deuce. Sorry, Honey Deuce.
What to wear:
Okay, we have to get something very painful out of the way. I appreciate every single fan that comes through the gates of a tennis tournament. The more, the merrier etc. But can somebody please explain to me, why do some of you dress as tennis players? Do you think that Novak will ask you to step in when he feels the heat and needs a break? Do you think Casper Ruud will want to see you forehand? The only exception is if through wearing the newest collection of your favourite player you want to show allegiance. Other than that, drop the tennis outfit, wear a suit. Bring your best outfit, show you care. Yes, it’s miserably hot but we’re competing with soccer here. We might never be the number one sports in the world but we sure can be the best dressed. Definitely bring sunglasses. Anything looks cool with sunglasses.
Which essentials to bring:
Sunscreen and a water bottle are a must. Do not forget a hat or buy a US Open one onsite. Some of the stands are metal. If it’s really hot, you will stick to it. Maybe bring something to sit on, a light sweater or denim jacket. It will come in handy at night, too, when New York sends fake fall winds our way. Mentally, be prepared for big crowds, loud bros, other sweaty bodies rubbing on yours (not in the fun way) and especially, most importantly, absolutely crucial to everything else you attempt to do, remember at all times: to leave your dignity at the gates.
HAVE FUN EVERYONE!
Things that make happy:
Otto Virtanen’s face makes me, and I can’t stress this enough, VERY happy. I just like to look at it from afar in all its symmetry and perfection. It makes me think of better days, days far gone. His game is not too bad either. Ever since Jarkko Nieminen retired from tennis the one thing we lacked in our tiny little tennis world was a new Fin on the horizon. I think we found him.
Things that make me unhappy:
Today, is my two year anniversary of tennis retirement. That is not what makes me unhappy. I’m fine. What makes me unhappy is that nobody seems it fit to celebrate two year retirement anniversaries. Time for a culture war!
See you all next week on Monday as I will land in your inboxes after both finals, men’s and women’s, have concluded. Who will be crowned champion? We will find out soon.
For now, I remain:
Yours truly, Andrea
💯 I wore Comme to the Surbiton Challenger. It is beholden on us to all do better!
Happy two year anniversary, Andrea. I'm glad I was able to cover that final US Open match you played in '22. https://www.tennis.com/news/articles/andrea-petkovic-brings-everything-she-had-give-final-us-open-bencic-retirement
To answer your question about why people wear tennis clothes to watch tennis: Why not? I did this often in my teens, sometimes after already having played, sometimes prior. Tennis is the rare big-time professional sport that a great many spectators actually also play. Dressing that way made me feel that much more in in the thick of things, that much more immersed participant than remote observer, that much more enmeshed in the sport I loved so very much in a kinesthetic rather than merely cognitive way. Heck, once, at the Los Angeles Tennis Club, a Wimbledon champion offered to hit with me for five minutes while he awaited the arrival of his practice partner. Throughout my media career, there were times I've worn wore wristbands. But I'll draw the line on trotting out a bag, stuffed with racquets, etc. Look forward to more of your stories.